Wednesday, December 26, 2007

We're Not in Kansas Anymore Toto.

Well, it's 12:11 am so it's officially Boxing Day.

It's all over.

And a great day it was.

Everyone was happy and bright, stuffed and satisfied.

I think we all deserve a pat on the back.

Today at noon I delivered my daughter to her father and his family to celebrate Christmas with them. Stick with me, it's going to get confusing. So my mother, my father, my daughter and husband/step-father go to have a Christmas visit with my daughter's father, his mother and father (who are divorced), his two sisters (one who is living with a man who is divorced and has a daughter, and one who is married to a man who has been divorced twice already). Then the mother of/former wife and the daughter of the man who lives with sister #1 came to have a Christmas visit and they brought a grandfather. I think there were five divorces, two re-marriages, three sets of grandparents, two step-parents, and two children.

We're not in Kansas anymore Toto.

You would never had known any of the family histories by watching us. We had a wonderful time. Exchanging and opening gifts, visiting and catching up, spoiling the girls. I marveled at it all and apparently so did others although we didn't say it out loud. Was it easy? It's getting better. Was it hard? Sometimes. Would we have rather done something else? Probably.

Why? Why do we do it? Why do we sit together at school concerts instead of at opposite ends of the school gym (like other families I know)? Why are we polite, kind, considerate and even glad to see each other? The answer is sooooooo easy.

For two little of which is my own.

It can be done. It should be done. Families aren't perfect, even the perfect ones.

I always say it comes down to how much you love your kids (providing no one is in any danger, etc.).

Grown-ups need to be the grown-ups so the kids can be the kids.

Mercy, time, forgiveness (??), perspective, resolution, peace of mind and heart are all good things.

I'm glad it's over, but I'm glad we do it.

And the best part is that my daughter thinks it's absolutely normal to have blended, extended family...because she has a family. And families stick together - somehow, some way, it will work out.

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